Tag Archives: poetry

So, what comes next?

Ah yes, the after moments of achieving a milestone in one’s life often feels anticlimactic. The come down from the serotonin high and adrenaline rush that follows a completion of sorts. I have been an emotional wreck this past week after publishing my first poetry book. I suddenly felt the finality of what was a culmination of ten plus years of writing, and I felt like I was fumbling around in the dark, looking for the damn light switch.

Now, deep down, I know I have only just started this new and fantastical journey, and there are many more speed bumps and hurdles I’ll cross.

At this very moment, all I have is the start of a new day, and I’m entirely content with that.

I will spend my day with a tiny group of family, celebrating my 29th birthday immensely proud of myself. Probably for the first time in years, I can say I’m proud of myself.

The only consistency I have had is holding on to my education as a crutch. I would make excuses for not having a “career” or a stable job because I never wanted any of those things, not really. What I want is freedom, creatively, physically, emotionally. I was never meant to operate on a regular schedule or the typical nine to five.

The very thought causes me a lot of anxiety, and I consider myself extremely lucky that I live in a time where I can make my OWN rules and schedules. Yes, I’ll have to work my ass off, but it’s all worth it.

I genuinely don’t mind being up until almost six in the morning writing, laughing, making beautiful human connections. And then waking up at two in the afternoon making some espresso, coffee and listening to music. I generally don’t worry about the banality of most people’s routines, nor do I look down upon it. Everyone is different, and I love that. What works for some will not work for others, and so it goes.

My wise words of the day: take some deep breaths, sing your goddamn heart out and tell someone you care about that you love them, always tell them.

Until next time


Also go buy my book if that’s what you’re in to.

Publishing a book

For as long as I can remember, it has always been my dream to publish a book. I never knew what the contents of it would be, but it was one constant goal of mine in life. I can finally say I kept my promise and followed through. Now, whether or not I make lots of money from it is not my main goal. It would be delightful for it to take off and make a lot! However, I told myself a long time ago to be realistic.

The process of self-publishing is relatively simple through amazon. Coupled with a few other apps that I used to design the cover and text. I was incredibly surprised because it certainly isn’t the way it used to be. There was a long process, you would get a publisher or agent, and things progress from there. I found myself dreaming of a fantasy world where I became a best-seller, went on a book tour, you get the point.

I never thought of it as a pipe dream, but I did recognize that it was not practical. But life isn’t always about being practical and pragmatic. I decided a few months ago that I didn’t want to live life on life’s terms. I wanted to live on my terms without limitations. My lovely late grandmother told me in what was one of the roughest times in my life, and I quote, “you need to take back the remote control and press your own buttons again.” Now, it took me many more years to fully grasp her words, but they stuck with me and continued to carry them through more difficult times in life.

What I’m trying to say is that I took back control. I ended up quitting my environmental sustainability program at university and started to write full time again. It wasn’t my first degree, and as I approach my 29th birthday in a few days, I knew I had made the right choice. Who knows one day I may get another, but it wasn’t right for me anymore. I decided to be selfish for once and take a chance on me. If you’re wondering how It felt or if you weren’t, I’ll tell you anyway. It was terrifying and exhilarating, but I don’t regret any of it. Take a chance on yourself, you might be surprised.

Until next time